The big churn…

Here I sit, late in the evening, starring once again at the screen as the cursor flashes at me expectantly, like a dog wanting me to throw the ball…again!

I had my “regular” appointment with my main therapist earlier today. I say regular in that we are now down to every three months. But a lot of “stuff” came up that I have not been dealing with and I really need to. While I’m in a relatively good position of strength in some aspects, others, not so much. And those are the issues. Fortunately for me, she knows me so well that that she can spot BS in a heart beat and calls me on. And that was our conversation today.

Lots of things churning in my head. And trust me, that is usually not a good thing. As for me, on a personal, individual level, she has never seen me stronger. We talked a lot about me support systems (family and friends), how I am so comfortable in my own skin, in my own life. And this, I feel, is accurate. I have never felt more at peace or stronger in my conviction as to who I am. People are either on board with who I am, as a person, or they need to get out of my way. Fortunately, the result of this is that I have more friends than ever. So, lucky me! I am always meeting up with people to chat, have dinner, drinks, movies, walks etc. It is rare I am home in the evenings. So that is good. I am also being asked to do more speaking engagements, etc, which I haven’t done anything to solicit in any real way, but they are just coming in. I’m happy to help. But, and this came out of my session today, I need to be careful and not over commit. So I have to work on that!!

I still have other things to work on. I still really need to work on me. To truly understand what I want and need. To have an accurate picture of what I have to offer, what is a support, and what is a drain on my energy and psyche. That is going to take some time. And that is what we spent the majority of the time talking about. I am no where near having that figured out, as it turns out. Who knew?!?! Obvoiously, I didn’t. But when I listened to what I was saying, really listened and forced to really get to the centre of it all, that is not an area of strength for me, at least not right now. But I will get there.

As a result, I need to take some time and step back a bit to really understand “me”. While I know “who I am”, I don’t feel very confident in other areas, particularly with relationships. It is clear to me that I still have a lot of issues to work out from my past relationship of 32 years. I thought I was done, and “good with it”. But I am not. And I guess I really knew that, but was in denial and/or trying to just push it out of the way. Well, over the past month or so, it has pushed its way back and came up right in my grill, so to speak. And that’s okay. Cuz now I can start to work on it. I can come at it from a position of strength. I am happy as me, now I have to become happy and content as “just me”. Without the complexity of anyone else. Only then will I be able to enter into a healthy relationship, able to give and take support and love. Yet another twist (with a few turns) in my journey to be the best me I can be. We all need to get there.

And that’s why I value my support team so much. They push me to places I try to avoid, to my own detriment. So it’s time to put my big girl pants on and face it. So I shall. I will wrestle this to the ground with her help. That’s why we all need someone to talk to, a professional, that can hold our feet to the fire, call BS when they see it and really help us to see what we don’t or can’t. Invest in yourself. We are all worth it. I will get this done.

Time. It’s just a matter of time.

Dodged a bullet…

Finally, after a month from hell…I have resolution and can now breath. So what the hell am I talking about? I just got the results from a biopsy done three weeks ago. Yes, THREE WEEKS! What a sh!t show that was. OMG. Due to genetics, and no other reason (thanks Dad!!) I am tested regularly for cancer. This time they really wanted to take a really good look, so to speak. And low and behold, they did find something. So they took a biopsy. Then more fun and games. I guess it takes some time to do the test and get results back. Then the surgeon’s office was closed, and then he was away, blah, blah, blah. Meanwhile, I’m left hanging. And that is not a good place for my furry little brain to be. Add on to that the stress leading up to the procedure and it’s been well over a month of “ick”.

The very few people that new, such as my sister (to whom I tell EVERYTHING) said it is probably nothing, and I’m fine. In fact the surgeon said he was “hopeful”. Ya, well, they’ve been wrong before. And if passed experience is any indicator of future experience, well, let’s just say there was precedence for my concern. This was deja vu, all over again.

You see, over a year and a half ago, I was in a similar circumstance. I was in quite a bit of discomfort with some chest pain. But only chest pain, no other symptoms at all. To be safe, they did a stress test. Nothing conclusive. So, they did another stress test. Nothing really conclusive. In fact, the cardiologist told me to keep on doing my 5km runs, I was fine, it was “probably nothing”. However, just to be safe, they ordered yet another test, an angiogram. And that’s when it all hit the fan.

When they were doing the diagnostic, they went and got a cardiac surgeon while I was still on the table and hooked up to everything. Within minutes of the surgeon reviewing the results (photos, etc) he looked at me and said. “Oh dear….you aren’t going to make it through the night. In fact, I’m surprised you are still alive!”. Not at all, at all, what I was expecting. And I don’t think anyone else was expecting it either. So within minutes, I was rushed to the cardiac intensive care unit, but on thinners, sedated and prepped for surgery. Long story short is that it was totally successful and I’m fine. It was totally genetic (once again, thanks Dad) and everything now is better than before.

But there in lies the reason for my mild panic. Okay, maybe not so mild. I get nervous when they say “it’s probably nothing”. Cuz experience has taught me different. So to everyone who didn’t know, I apologize. I know there are a bunch of people that are ticked I didn’t tell them what was going on. But that is how I needed to deal with it. My daughters didn’t even know. I didn’t want people to be concerned if there was nothing to be concerned about. So until results were in, I didn’t want to go down that road.

The last thing I needed was to have people dote over me, and mother me. That is the very last thing I need. I needed as much normalcy in my life as I could get. Particularly as my life has been anything but normal for the past number of years. I am really liking my “new normal” and have settled into a wonderful life. I survived previous health issues. A second chance. I have transitioned to my authentic self and started a new life. A new beginning. I have survived a serious threat to my health a while ago. Another new chance. And now this. I dodged a bullet, been given the all clear, almost like yet again another chance. Here’s hoping I don’t have to go back to that well again, cuz even cats only have nine lives!! Ha ha. So, it’s all good. I’m back, ready to re-engage with the world and the wonderful people in it.

Just hope you are all ready for it!!! 😉



Staying occupied…?

Interesting weekend. Mostly good. Even though I had to work half the time, I did find ways to keep my brain occupied, which right now, is a good thing. But holy….it can be exhausting!! Ha ha.

I had the pleasure of meeting up with two friends for coffee and catching up, which is always nice. We shared updates on our families and common experiences of late. The rest of the time I spent on the boat, which is almost always a good thing. But this time it was a bit different. While always enjoyable, again, it was trying to relax and keep my brain engaged at the same time. If you think that sounds like an oxymoron, well, that’s cuz I think it is. Anyway….

I did get the upholstery steam cleaned, everything surface sanitized within and inch of it life and provisions, cloths, bedding etc, but away. The weekend was great weather wise for the most part. Nights were calm and quiet, a bazillion stars out, people sitting around in the big Adirondack chairs by the fire pit in the evening, chatting. It’s a great little community! It was a bit cool though…I had to get up in the middle of the night to turn on the heat. But that is really what you would call a “first world problem”. !!

Once all the “chores” were done and it was quiet, I did have the chance to sit and reflect about a recent conversation. I had lunch with my lawyer last week, who has also become a wonderful friend and ally. We took the time to catch up on things at work, family, other recent events, ya know, just some basic girl talk. But the one thing she has a great knack for is providing a very objective point of view from the outside, i.e. not a member of my “community”. I know I can count on her for anything. She’s the type of friend that will tell you have have something stuck in your teeth if you know what I mean !! LOL.

She can sees things that I can’t. I’m in my own head looking out. She’s on the outside looking in, so to speak. She can see things about me that I can’t and provide a unique perspective. So I was able to reflect on some of her comments based on the topics we chatted about. I am so fortunate to have a friend like that. Because we obviously both have a legal background, we get each other on a professional level. But more importantly, we get each other on a personal level. We know when not to “go there” and not step on each others toes, or violate our individual spaces, but at the same time, are there to encourage, provide our thoughts/insights, and just have a good laugh, usually about ourselves!

Everyone needs a friend like this. I know I can chat about the same topics with other people. Take my sister, for example. We usually talk twice a week for about an hour each time. To say we are very close is a huge understatement. And for the past 2-3 weeks, it’s more like 4 times a week as she is keeping tabs on how I am doing. It’s amazing. She’s my sister, so of course, she’s a bit biased! Which is a good thing….no, a great thing. To have that support and love is awesome.

There are also my friends in my community. We understand what we are going through with respect to transitioning, etc. And don’t get me wrong, that is awesome. We connect on that level. Each of those relationships provide a different perspective. For me though, the “trifecta” is to have that other outside perspective. One that my other friends, not in the community provide. And you know who you are. I so appreciate they are in my life, and I am richer for it. And if I ever needed them, it’s now.

I can only hope that someday, I will be able to return the favour.

Always something to learn

Earlier this week, I had the opportunity and pleasure to co-host a radio talk show on a local station. They were going to discuss Bill C16, which is in the final reading of our Federal Senate. The bill seeks to add gender identity and gender representation to the list of protections under the Human Rights Act. So, I was asked to be a guest co-host to provide comment on both the bill and the process.

It was so much fun! The co-host did a great job of making me feel welcome, though I was still really nervous. I was speaking way too fast in the beginning, but after the first commercial break, I was able to calm down a bit and relax. It was a really good discussion. The time flew by.

But I also learned a few things about what is going on in other parts of the country that reflect some of the sentiment of the public. As this is a Federal bill, input has been received from numerous people and organizations across the country both against and in support. Many spoke from experience and others, simply voicing their opinion. So our discussion was focused around some of that, and trying to understand, and explain to the general audience what was being said as many don’t understand the nuances of definitions and terminology. And I must admit, there were a few times when I “energetically” disagreed with some of the comments we were discussing.

It occurred to me that it is no wonder the non trans community is a bit confused by all of this. Okay, a lot confused. Because there are times when even we as a community are confused. But I did try to take the high road and rescue myself. In the end, it was a great experience and I learned a bit more about myself and about my community and the issues in general. They did say they would like to have me back another time, so I guess I didn’t screw up that much.

I guess I have the perfect face for radio!!! 😉

When will the adults show up…?

To say it’s been an “interesting” two weeks is an understatement at best. It’s been a pain in the ass two weeks. So many things I am having to deal with. But hey, such is life right? I am hoping for resolution on a big issue in the next day or two, but it’s been a long two weeks. Thankfully, people have understood and let me do what I have needed to do for myself and let me get through on my own, which I desperately need to do. I appreciate that, I really do. I just need to keep busy and not talk about anything. Cuz I will loose it if I do, and that, right now, is not productive.

One issue that just got tossed onto the flames was the upcoming event regarding my youngest daughter. Her “call to the bar” Ceremony is taking place near the end of June. A joyous occasion for sure! However, there are those that seem determined to make it about themselves and not her. Let me explain. I was the first one my daughter called when she got the date and asked if I was going to be able to go. Couldn’t say “yes” fast enough. I told her that I had no idea who else would be going, and I really didn’t. I found out subsequently that her mother and grandparents are also going. That’s awesome. They should be there to share this with her. I was very pleased.

My oldest daughter is also going. Which is great. All together to celebrate her day. Perfect. Or so I thought. Now, I am finding out that they have issues. My oldest daughter has stated that if we (the adults) can’t sit together, she isn’t going to go. She is not going to be put in the position of being forced to choose with whom to sit. Apparently, “they” (my ex, and in laws, aka mother and grand parents) don’t want to be anywhere near me. Which would then force my oldest to choose. And knowing her, she wouldn’t want to me to be sitting alone, so she would sit with me, thereby pissing of my ex and in-laws as well as her sister who doesn’t want any drama. And neither do I.

So, what is it with people? Can’t they just get over themselves and see how much this is impacting my two girls? Their own daughters and grand daughters? This day has nothing, absolutely nothing, to do with them. It’s all about celebrating the accomplishment of my totally awesome daughter. Can’t they just be adults for 90 minutes? What is the point?!? Seriously. Come on. It is so frustrating and I get so angry at them.

I get it. They hate me and think I’m a freak. Message received, got the memo. They don’t have to talk to me, they don’t even have to look at me. They can even scowl at me if they want to. Don’t care. I am so over it. I’m a big girl and can look after myself. And I certainly don’t place any value on what they think about me anyway. Their loss. Truly.

If the past is any indication, they are hoping I will back down, and not show up. Well guess what. Not gonna happen. My girl, she wants me there. I’m going. I am also not going to hold back. I am going to be who I am. I have my dress picked out etc, etc. So they are just going to have to deal with it. This has nothing to do with them. Zero. Nadda. Zip. Nothing.

It would be nice if the adults could show up…

What’s in YOUR emotional wallet…?

I’m sure all of us at some point take a few minutes to clean out our wallets/purses. You often find things that you really don’t need any more but they cause stress on the wallet due to taking up too much space. Things like old movie ticket stubs, to do lists, grocery lists, untold receipts that you can’t read anymore, etc, etc, etc. I do that on a regular basis my self. It’s amazing the sh!t I find in there that has no purpose what so ever. But what about your emotional wallet?

So there I am in my happy place, which in this case is curled up on the port side lounger by the helm, blanket, cup of tea, thinking about just that. Time to clean out my emotional wallet. And trust me when I say there is a lot of sh!t in there that I really don’t need to deal with anymore. Hurtful comments, being ignored, or worse yet, being singled out. Loss. Great losses. Plenty of emotional scars over the years that did occupy space in my emotional wallet, but not anymore. 

That being said, it doesn’t mean that there aren’t more things that end up in there, with a promise that I will deal with them later, much like stuffing a used theatre ticket in there. This clean out will take a bit of time. Some are easy. Others, not so much. But I do work on them. The hope being that in the end, there will be more room of useful things and it won’t be as stressed from the excessive stuff that doesn’t provide any value what so ever. As example, for me, now, this means finally dealing with the issue that no matter what I do, it’s not good enough for someone. Time to let that one go and move on. The only people I answer to now are myself and my two girls. Others? Not so much. That one got tossed out. 

And so it goes. Each item examined and dealt with. Some getting tossed out easily, in the hopes they end up in a place far, far away. Others, go back inside, to be dealt with at another time, when I’m stronger and have more answers. Until then, I remain confident in who I am, proud of the person I have become and my accomplishments. Do I still have work to do? Oh hell yes. I am a work in progress. And who knows? Maybe I always will be. The journey continues. Hopfullly with a lighter wallet and spirit.

How about you? What’s in your e-wallet?

The shoe’s on the other foot…

Recently I had dinner with a friend of mine who was recently separated. I have known her and her family for about 20 years. It had been awhile since we hooked up. Finally we found a time that worked for both of us. So off I went to her house to have dinner with her and her two boys. Four hours later, I emerged a bit tired, both physically and mentally. Also very happy. Happy that we had a chance to catch up and to see that while she is struggling, she’s doing a bit better, all things considered. I also found myself in an….awkward position. Okay, maybe not awkward, but viewing things from a different perspective. Don’t get me wrong, that is often a good thing, and this was proving to be no exception. 

You see, she separated a short time ago due to her husband becoming both verbally, mentally and at times physically abusive. But wait, there’s more. This was due to a vast change in behaviour due to a brain injury sustained three years ago. And while he survived it, he was changed. Permanently. It was also getting worse. While that makes the situation even more sad, it doesn’t mean she has to be a victim and sentenced to a life of despair. Even though it is not something anyone can control, she had to do something. A brave but necessary decision. 

One thing that she is struggling with is that  never in million years did she think even a year ago that she would be a single mom, separated from the person she had been with for 25 years. And while she knew it was not deliberate, he was no longer the man she married. So there I am listening, supporting and trying to provide whatever small amount of comfort I could, I couldn’t help but think, that was me. I was the one that caused the same pain for my ex. And that was really hard to take. Okay, so ya, I have been able to process all of that on an intellectual level, but on an emotional level? Different story. The impact of what I did was starring at me in the face, albeit with a surrogate. 

I was exposed to all the emotion, hurt, and pain the change in her husband was causing her. I could only imagine that was very similar to the pain I caused my ex. I say “imagine” because I never got to find out. You see, I never got to see the full impact on my ex.  She simply left. Okay, maybe not simply, but you know what I mean. We never talked it out. She didn’t want to. I offered to go to couples counseling. She declined. I offered to introduce her to my therapist who would be able to answer some of her questions regarding transgender. She declined. I offered several quality authoritative resources on the topic. She declined. She even went so far as to tell me via an email that she wasn’t going to research any of it. She never yelled at me, cried at me, called me names, threw things (which should never do regardless), but you get the picture. 

So I never got to see what impact I had. Which at the time was probably a good thing as we were both pretty fragile. But that whole thing was lacking in my experience. Maybe that’s one of the reasons why I have difficulty with closure. Regardless, I did witness first hand the implications of a similar yet different situation. We both acknowledged that I caused the same pain for me ex as she was experiencing to a certain degree. But we were able to get passed it pretty quick as I continued to focus on her. This wasn’t in any shape or form about me. It was all about her. And so it went.

The shoe was certainly on the other foot for the first time in a while. And let me tell you, I could feel the blister forming. But it did provide an opportunity to reflect and learn. So for now, there is bandage on and I’m back to my comfy shoes. 

For now. 


I sit here, in my home office, having just returned from an evening meeting after work, thinking about an outing with a girlfriend from work the other night. It was a gorgeous summer like evening so we decided to head downtown to one of my favourite haunts for dinner. I am thinking about several things she said during our 3 hour dinner and chat. First, some context, or maybe more accurately, background?

I have known her for about 15 years. She actually did some work for me on a temporary basis and saved my butt when I was in Slovenia for extended negotiations for a chunk of time, and she was back at the office keeping things moving. So we have some history, so to speak. One of many of her qualities I truly appreciate, is her ability and willingness to be brutally honest. She doesn’t mess around. If she has a question, she blurts it out. If something is on her mind, she states it. No cutesy or time wasting stupid games. Up front and honest. And she makes no apologies for it. It’s who she is, like it or lump it. I like it.

People like her are invaluable in my life. I can always count on her to not sugar coat things and just tell me. The raw truth. Don’t get me wrong, it was hard to take at first, to figure out that this is just the way she is. She doesn’t mean any harm, but doesn’t see the point in beating around the bush. So, she’s somewhat refreshing, as dealing with cutesy carp is exhausting.

The same goes for questions. If she doesn’t know or understand the “how and/or the why” of something, she’ll just come out and ask. And trust me, there was a lot she didn’t know or understand about being trans. Although she has been super great with me right out of the gate, she wants to learn. Which is awesome….I’m always up for that! I know I can always count on her to tell me what I need to hear, not what I want to hear. And she will do it quickly and to the point. As a result, we have wonderful discussions.

Everyone needs to have at least one person like that in their lives. A true supporter. Not just a cheerleader. I try to be that, but I admit, I find it difficult at times. When someone needs to get a whack over the head, I have a tendency to wrap that two by four in so much bubble wrap, that my message is lost. Some call that compassion. And maybe that’s what and who I am. But there are times when that may not be want the person truly needs. I’ve never been good with “tough love”.

So I learned something. Maybe I have to work on this a bit more. In the grand scheme of things, what I tell people is really just my opinion, usually based upon my experiences, lessons learned, research etc. At the end of the day, they can take it or leave it. Their choice. But people at least deserve the opportunity to hear that information to add to their knowledge bank, in whatever form that may take, or not at all if they don’t want to. Maybe I’m doing them a disservice? Maybe I’m not effective or truly helpful?

More to think about….but that’s a good thing.

Transitioning: It’s not a race…

A few days ago, I met up with a transwoman who is preparing to “come out” at work in the very near future. She is in a branch of our military and was referred to me by a friend of mine who works at National Defense Headquarters. I must say, it was a super enjoyable conversation! Well, for me at least…. a few hours with me, maybe not so much for her! Ha ha.

She’s older, around my age so we had a lot in common with respect to life experiences. What I really enjoyed was how well she had, and is, preparing for all of this. While there is no single way to do this and yes, everyone’s journey is their own, I have noticed over the years there are a few things that successful transitions have in common. She is being patient, and for her, that seems to be working well.

I know, trust me, patience is something that is really hard to maintain once the decision is made to transition. Once you pull the trigger, so to speak, you want to be that bullet. You want to get to your target as fast as you can. Your new, authentic life. I get that, I really, really do. But here’s the catch, at least in my case. Sometimes it can be a moving target. You know where you want to go, but along the way, something happens, and you have to take a detour. Set backs hit. Financially, emotionally, within your support network, family, the list goes on and on.

You burst out of the gate, run like hell only to find the finish line has moved….farther away. You sprint again, and nope, not there. Now, you’re getting frustrated, exhausted and generally pissed off. Not a good place to be. And sometimes, for some of us, this is our journey. So what’s my point? My point, or at least what my take away from this conversation with this woman was, it reinforced for me that this is marathon. Slow and steady. Allow for readjustments. Stuff happens. LIFE happens. And if you’re not prepared or ready to make adjustments, it can be a really tough journey.

That is what I appreciated about how this woman was approaching her journey. Careful, thoughtful steps, very few knee jerk reactions. Just like thinking before you speak (which I admittedly don’t do at times – I know you’re shocked, Notm 😉 !!) taking time to consider reactions and possible alternatives/solutions is her mantra. It was refreshing to see. So many people that I meet are struggling. Some for legitimate reasons, be it financially, lack of access to resources, family etc. but for others it is because, in my opinion, they can’t seem to stop getting in their own way. They are so excited and impatient and just want to get there. And I get that. But sometimes you have to get ready for a marathon. Time, patience and prep work.

Now that’s not to say that everything has to analyzed to death. Paralysis by analysis can also be an outcome. And I do know people that analyze the crap out of everything. That may work for them, fair game, but I know for certain that it is not working for many that I know that are susceptible to that pattern of thinking/problem solving.

So what is the point of this ramble? It’s okay to take your time if  you can. Stop. Take inventory, check your map so to speak. It’s not a race. Take time to celebrate the small victories along the way. Give yourself a pat on the back when you can and when you need it. It takes a special person to make this journey. And you are special. Trust me. You’ll get there. Do it safely. Do it smart. The finish line will still be there.

And we will be there waiting for you with open arms.

A time to serve

Not to be confused with “serving time” !! Last evening I was elected to the Board of Directors for the PRIDE organization in my city. While I know this is a cause that I can really get my teeth into, so to speak, I can’t help but think this is sort of a good news – bad news type of thing. What makes me think that? Good question.

Sad to say that I have in no way been affiliated with this organization in anyway in the past. That’s my bad, totally. They had never heard of me. What little activism I have been doing is either on my own as requested, or on behalf of my Trans support group. So how did I end up on the board of PRIDE? It’s like this…

I was approached some weeks ago by a member of the nominations committee, who is also a friend of mine, to see if I would be interested in serving. I had no idea she was on the board actually. (That in and of itself is sad.) As I will be coming off of a board that I have been extremely invested in for the past eight years, I have been quietly on the search for another to serve, but this time, more related to my community. So, my interest was peaked. I agreed to go through the vetting process. CV, statement of interest, etc were submitted. I was asked to attend a meeting with the current board and other potential nominees to receive a briefing on the “lay of the land” so to speak so that we were going into this “eyes wide open”.

That was…interesting…revealing, and a little bit scary. I was asked to speak to my strengths, and what concerns I had, if any. It was actually a very informative exercise. I left wondering if this was really a good fit for me. So much to be done, but would I be one of the people to contribute effectively to get it done? So I stewed about it for a bit, as only I can do. But at the end of the day, I decided to let my name stand. That, however, was no guarantee. There is still the vote that had to take place at the Annual General Meeting. That was last evening.

There were some very interesting and probing questions for me by the membership. I did not pull any punches, I just spoke about what I thought the challenges are moving forward and how I typically approach such things. I decided that I wasn’t going to pull any punches or tell them what I thought they wanted to hear. After all, this is a volunteer position. I don’t need to be doing this. So in a way, it was more for me to vet them than vice versa. In the end, when asked one more time prior to the vote, I felt comfortable enough to let my name stand. And the rest, as they say, is history.

What’s next? There is a meeting of the board later this week, to appoint the executive as indicated by the bylaws. Once that is done, sighing authorities are updated, as is the list of board and executive to the province as required by the Not For Profit Corporations Act. Committees also have to be filled. So it’s going to be a busy meeting as we work our way down the checklist.

Fortunately, the committee that is responsible for the annual PRIDE day event to be held in June, appear to have everything under control, so that is a huge help. My goal is not to get in their way, but let them do their thing. That I am really good at doing!! Ha ha. Until I know my exact role, I’m not going to fuss about stuff. And the good news is that I actually do know a few people on the board already which helps, but I am clearly the new kid on the block.

That being said, I have already been told that I am going to be receiving an invitation to an evening reception aboard one of her Majesty’s naval ships that will be in port here in a few weeks as it is being re-positioned. All local dignitaries will be there including the mayor and commander of our military base as well as federal and provincial members of parliament etc. I’m going to be there to represent PRIDE. No pressure! Actually it really isn’t, as I know most of these people already anyway. So, it would appear they don’t waste time.

So there it is. Will be interesting to see how that all works out. But I am optimistic and quite looking forward to it I must say. Ask me the same questions in six months…I hope I have the same answer. In the meantime, it’s time to completely chill out. My boat goes in the water this week, my girls are probably coming home for the long weekend, so the plan is to spend time aboard to get her all ready for the season. Not sure if it will be ready to stay on board overnight, but I am hopeful!

I am always hopeful…