November 29, 2016

Interesting how varied the protocols are for getting your name changed at various businesses. Drivers Licence and Health Card was a major PITA. They were okay with the name change, given that I had my official change of name documentation from the government. Gender change? Different story. I honestly think part of it was with the person I was dealing with. He was a total nob. We “debated” over the process for 10 minutes while I informed him of the policies and processes posted on the government website for change of gender. I had to bring him up to date and explain it to him. He finally went to get his supervisor and after much back and forth, they agreed. However, I had to produce a passport to prove citizenship, so they said. That was a new one to me???!!! I had just handed them my old health card issued to me as a Canadian Citizen back in the day. I’m pretty sure I am still a Canadian citizen!! Why did they need to have further proof? Anyway, that was 1.5 hours of my life I will never get back.

 

Auto and home insurance? Took about 2 minutes. Polite, professional, no issue. Bell for my home phone, TV and internet? Over the phone, no documentation (which I found shocking?). Utilities for my home…same thing, over the phone, less than a minute. So, now onto really fun things like my dive certifications so I can instruct (once I clear medical…hopefully soon…), Airmiles etc, etc etc. All sorts of stuff to get done. One last big one to do….birth certificate. That is going to be at least 4 months and will be a battle all the way as 1) I don’t live in the province I was born in, and 2) that is further exacerbated by the fact I was born in Quebec, where the ministry there is just nuts. No other word to describe that. That means HUGE delay in getting my passport and Social Insurance updated….ugh. So I don’t know what the means for tax purposes for submitting my income tax as my documents from work will be in my correct name, but Social Insurance number will be in my dead name…so……..

 

One step at a time………

 

November 22, 2106

One step forward, and two steps back….

 

Sent a text to my ex last week regarding making plans for who is where for the upcoming holiday season with respect to the kids. Last year was a complete sh*t show, so in trying to avoid that, I thought it would be a good idea if we talked about it to provide some guidance for the kids (They are all grown and on their own). They just need to know where to be when, kind of thing. Well, I finally heard back from my ex yesterday. Turns out, she and my youngest already made plans without telling either me, or my oldest daughter. Good Grief. Just when I thought things we getting better!! My ex was so smug in telling me our youngest would be spending the holidays with her, with a day going to her boyfriends parent’s place. I honestly thought things were getting better between my and my youngest, but it would appear that is not the case and I am loosing her a bit. In my text message to my ex last week (that’s how she prefers to communicate), I offered to meet on neutral ground and go for coffee somewhere of her choosing. She countered with a phone call one evening this week. So clearly, I have done something to “ruffle her feathers)…..

 

If this appears juvenile, that’s because maybe it is.

 

One more reason to hate the holidays…..bah humbug…….

 

November 20, 2016

Very solemn event last evening as we read the names of all those murdered in the past year just because they were trans*. And it didn’t include all those that committed suicide due to bullying, harassment, and mental/physical abuse. While it is very sad, I was glad I was able to speak at the event, and not be one of those spoken about……..moment of silence……

 

November 15, 2016

Had a loooong chat with my therapist yesterday. She was, as always, able to bring a few key issues to the surface, so we talked them out. A good therapist is worth their weight in gold, a great one??? You’d kill for! That how good she is. So, lots to think about, but we pretty much wrestled the big ones to the ground. I don’t see her again until the week before Christmas….she just wants to make sure that I am set emotionally for it. As long as I get some time with my girls, I’m good, so not anticipating any issues. But, then again, I wasn’t expecting any since I saw her last time 6 weeks ago, but lo and behold, there they were! Ain’t life grand?!?!?

 

November 11, 2016

Just received notification from my friend and attorney…..my divorce has been finalized. Not sure what to think about that. I’m happy for her…I know this is what she both wanted and needed…but I’m very sad. Not that I didn’t know that it was going to happen, but still, not what I planned on when I took my vows 32 years ago. I know that we are both better off, for sure. But it is still difficult to realize.

 

I was at a meeting she was part of last week, and it was really hard. She looked great! Was her usual articulate and brilliant self. I wanted to give her such a big hug, so badly. This is not a good day right now……

 

November 9, 2016

Spent the day yesterday at a lovely resort/spa, meeting with a group of people from a multi-national to assist with a recent merger. Did’t get to see any of the facility at all, arriving at 2:00 a.m., and working with them from 10:00 a.m. – 5:30 p.m. then dinner and the long drive home. That sorta sucked….I really could have used a massage!! Great group, really interesting conversations, and they were very eager to work with me. While I was there, got another consulting request from the booking manager, this time, one of Canada’s largest banks. International trade law seems to be a hot topic….maybe companies want to get stuff done before “the Donald” builds the walls and shuts down trade ?? (Ha ha…sort of…)

 

Anyway, the point being, for whatever reason….I am getting more requests for my time than ever before. While I was afraid I would loose a ton of work after I transitioned, the opposite seems to be happening??? Really not sure what is going on with that????? Endless surprises on my journey…..at least this is a good one!

 

November 4, 2016

Had my first interview yesterday….local paper. Doing a story on the LGBT and Transgender policies within my organization (one of the largest employers in my region). They wanted to know if they have made a difference, if they are sufficient and what issues remain. It was an interesting experience. I believe it is going to print some time next week?? Also interviewed a very close friend of mine who has been and continues to be a huge supporter and mentor for me. So it was really great to hear her perspective as well. Here’s hoping we did the community justice?!?!?

 

November 3, 2016

Awesome welcome at work today. The staff decorated my office with everything “Erin” to celebrate my first birthday as my true self. It was very sweet of them. Given that I was here until 9:30 last night, they all came in early to do it. Truly amazing people ! No issues of acceptance here!! Which I am so thankful for…..every day.!!

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